Apply directly to the forehead!

Davenetics* : Five Reasons I Am Too Old to Blog:

"The commercials that air during the nightly news actually speak to me. I do have a restless leg. My wife and I often recline side by side in separate outdoor tubs, watch the sunset and wonder, “Are we ready?”. I eat Flomax like tic tacs. And I haven’t taken a shit without any outside help since the late nineties."